Insanely Absurd

Most of us have at least played one of the Mario games, whether we’ve played them all or not is another story, but even those who are largely shielded from technology usually know who Mario is. Anyway, to the point…

What if Mario was real? What do I mean by that? What I mean is, what if the character you were currently controlling as you were playing the game was actually a real person. Yes, this “concept” IS out there(WAY out there), but wouldn’t that just be crazy? Think of how many times Mario was forced to die because lame gamers weren’t able to keep him up and out of the lava. Every time he fell in that lava, he was screaming in horrible angst and pain! Yet, we just laughed and continued to do it again and again because our simple minded brains couldn’t control our fingers well enough to keep him out of harm. Even if we managed to not fall in any pits, our thumb happened to slip once in a while and a freaking flying shell slams into Mario. Have you even seen those shells!? They are like bigger than him when he is “small” and at least half his size even when he is shrooming(big/tall cause he got a mushshroom)! Think about if you were hit by a shell that big!

Poor, poor Mario, he is probably in so much pain. I know I for one will now forever think of Mario with a totally different view everytime I play. I’ll do my best for now on to make sure lava is avoided in the future with the utmost care, and those nasty shells will have nothing on me! Why does this only apply to Mario, you ask? Because does anyone actually care about any of the other game characters out there? That’s what I thought…